So everyone wants to live happily ever after, but how many of us reach this plateau??? How many times have we tried and tried, but have failed time after time, relationship after relationship? I’ve learned if someone wants you, they will rise to the occasion and take the necessary steps. ACTIONS speak louder than words. DO NOT CHASE ANYONE!! By chasing after someone, you put the ball in their court and more than likely your chasing them will ultimately chase them away.
Here are a few things that we think are “friendly gestures”, but ultimately is a part of the chase…
1) Being the one to initiate contact first all the time- Lets be real, if someone wants to contact you via phone, text, email or in person, especially if they have your contact information, they will, no one is that busy!!!. Stop chasing someone who does not put forth effort to contact you!
2) Do not pressure them about a title- If someone wants you a part of their life, make no mistake, your presence will be known to friends, family, co-worker and strangers. If it’s been months and you haven’t met any friends, family or other important people in their life, RUN, don’t walk away….as my friend would say, “Something in the milk ain’t clean.”
3) Being too available- Being too available may come off as desperation. You become “old faithful” because they know if all fails, you will be there waiting and ready with open arms: If someone is unable to stick to the plans that you’ve made, don’t sulk, pick up a new hobby, go out with friends, do everything but become upset. Carry on, business as usual. What’s so ironic is when you are caught up in your own life, then your suitor starts to develop an interest in why you are suddenly so unavailable. Most suitors love a challenge!!! Stop answering every call, accepting every outing, spend some time with yourself, your friends, family and God. In other words, DO YOU!!!
4) Do not try to compete- A man or woman who wants you and only you would never make you compete for their affection it is simply not worth your time! Focus on being the best you that you can be, improving your life and KEEP IT MOVING! Childish games… “Ain’t nobody got time for that!”
5) Forgive, but don’t FORGET- If this person is selfish, inconsiderate, unfaithful, untruthful (and the list goes on)..it is time to move on. Don’t stick around hoping and wishing that they will change. Talking, begging, crying, manipulation and pleading will not make them change. The motive for change has to be pure, as well as the intent and effort. Pray for them and move on! Sometimes God will allow us to have what we thought we needed, only to see that we did not need it at all.
These simple rules are key things to remember about relationships. We have got to stop letting people put us on “layaway” and then coming back to pick us up when they are ready (or when the other relationship didn’t work out)…we are more than that! God has a way of getting rid of people from our lives, that if it were not for his divine intervention, we would hold on to. Trust God for the separation that he allows, he wants to give us the best, not second best. Remember what we may feel is God’s REJECTION, may actually be him REDIRECTING us to something greater!!!
“TRUST IN THE LORD WITH ALL YOUR HEART AND LEAN NOT TO YOUR OWN UNDERSTANDING; IN ALL YOUR WAYS SUBMIT TO HIM AND HE WILL DIRECT YOUR PATHS.” -Proverbs 3:5-6
~ Many Blessings~